Human emotion
by lesbianbey
Summary: what is human emotion? / The conceptualization on of human emotions are foreign to Taylor, especially since she's a blank slate. However, her feelings for Leo are even more complicated than that. leo/taylor — On The Edge-compilant


**title** : human emotion

 **summary** : what is human emotion? / The conceptualization on of human emotions are foreign to Taylor, especially since she's a blank slate. However, her feelings for Leo are even more complicated than that. (Leo/Taylor).

 **notes** : I'm so trash for this pairing like I literally cannot ok. sorry if it sucks. also, follow me on tumblr and we can discuss our trash ships that don't involve the rats together, yeah? my url is the same as my username.

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It is a typical day on the island when the newest addition of the academy's student body's wakes up with the same constant question on her mind: what is human emotion. It's been weeks since she agreed to stay on the island so she can get better with her powers, and with her life since everyone else has the same issue that she has. However, she bets she is the only person on this island who hasn't really felt human emotion, simply because she doesn't know which emotion is which.

"Alright, day twenty of picking out a name for you," Leo announces with a tablet on his hand. "So far, you've turned down all of the suggestions I had, so I'm gonna—"

"What is human emotion?" She blurts out.

Leo stares at her weirdly. "What do you mean?"

"You know what I mean," she sighs, drawing her legs to her chest. "Everyone around me always talks about how they're happy to be on the island, or how you guys saved their lives, or something. I haven't felt anything when I came here because I don't know how to feel. Does that mean something is wrong with me?"

Leo stares at her for a split second. "Of course not," he answers honestly. "Most of the students here didn't really understand that either. You're not the only one. I'm just surprised that you told me this."

"Ugh," she groans. "That is what I'm talking about...surprise. What the hell does that mean?"

"For one thing, it is more of a reaction," he says.

She glares at the seventeen year old. She couldn't explain what she feels. It is like she wants to punch the guy in the face for saying something that doesn't help her situation, but she doesn't wanna actually do it. "You're not helping."

"I know," Leo smirks, and she really raises a fist to almost punch the guy. He catches her by surprise though. "Before you decide to go hostile on me, i'm just gonna say that human emotion is a very complex thing. People, to this day, don't really know how to explain them, or handle them. I don't even know how to explain my emotions. But...once you know that you are able to feel emotions, then you know that nothing is wrong with you."

She takes a deep breath. "I...still don't get it."

"What do you feel right now?" Leo questions her. "Explain it the best way you can. I know you can."

"I kind of want to punch you in the face," she says back. There is something else she feels but she doesn't want to explain it.

"Well...um...lesson over," Leo clears his throat, and taps how tablet a couple times. "Alright...I'm digging the name Charlotte."

"No!" She frowns.

"Maya," he suggests. "I kind of like it. It's mysterious."

"How about no," she frowns. She forcefully grabs the tablet away from Leo and looks at the list of names. She scrolls and scrolls until she finds a name that is simple and rolls off her tongue easily. "Taylor."

"Really? I kind of liked the name Charlotte," he replies.

"It's Taylor, and I'm sticking to it," she demands, and glares at Leo. "Got that?"

"Sure, ok, don't kill me!" He recoils, and shields himself from the girl, newly named Taylor. She smiles, and she identifies this sudden feeling as happiness.

/

Taylor still doesn't know human emotion, other than happiness and annoyance...and probably surprise. She feels happy when she completes a training session with her mentors exceptionally. She feels annoyed when her new friend Logan keeps on asking questions that are kind of stupid. Surprise, however, is something she doesn't understand yet but she would probably understand it more when she actually feels surprised.

There's another emotion that confuses her as much as much as surprise: jealousy. She does not like the way Logan kisses Leo's ass, at all. Not only did she find it creepy, she also had half a mind to maim the guy. Of course, she would never do that, but it doesn't mean that she doesn't think about it.

Shame follows immediately right after, because she knows that Logan is just a young boy who idolizes someone else older than him. He's only fifteen. She should never think about maiming a team member, especially since he is useful for the EMP ability combined by her and Leo. Plus, with everyone worshipping the other mentors, it's definitely worthy that someone looks up to the underdog.

However, she also feels something not very foreign when she trains with her new team: pain.

It is the worst out of all the things Taylor has ever felt. In one minute, she feels her insides on fire due to her maxing out her ability, and the next minute, it's a shot of pain that sends her flying backward. She feels nothing afterwards, but she isn't sure if that is worse than pain.

Taylor blacks out into nothingness, but no one told her that it will be the last time she would ever see a face again. No one could do anything to restore her eyesight (unless someone is kind enough to donate their eyes), which means that she is blind.

Disappointment is another negative emotion she comprehends, and hates it more than anything. She's disappointed at everyone for failing to save her eyesight. She's disappointed at her mentors for making Leo feel like shit. She's disappointed at herself, especially when she learns that Leo leaves the academy for his mistake that he can learn from. She's also disappointed at him for leaving. How could he leave, especially when she needs him to comprehend emotion? She doesn't know how to deal with her emotions yet. How could she learn to deal with them when she doesn't understand them completely?

It"s hard to control something you don't understand. Taylor learns that when she feels unbridled rage. It comes a week after Leo leaves the academy, and some of the students come to visit her in the infirmary. Ever since she lost her eyesight, her other senses heighten, especially hearing. Stronger auditory signals help her listen to side comments about her sudden disability. What pisses her off more is that it is so constant that it makes her head hurt, her teeth to grind, and her body feel hot. She clenches her fists against the sheets.

"Stop!" She yells, which stops some of the students and her mentors from talking.

The room is completely silent. She feels eyes on her. Her rage washes away and now she couldn't explain what she feels now. Her hands feel clammy under the pressure of others looking at her. She may be blind, but there's no doubt that people are staring from her outburst.

If only someone were here to help her.

/

Another week passes by, and Taylor is able to leave the infirmary with sensory eyewear so if an obstacle is in her way, a vibration will elicit to warn her of the sort. It is the best thing for her, considering her eyesight is irreversible (again, unless someone donates their eyes). She hoped that during the two weeks she was locked up in the infirmary that someone would convince Leo to pull his head out of his own ass and join the academy again. However, there is no such luck.

Sighing, Taylor trains with her only friend Logan, even when her mentors leave for the award ceremony that started this madness. She didn't blame the timing nor does she blame the recognition that they rightfully deserve. It's just that some people also needed to be recognized for saving the world, even if it is 31.5 times.

When she hears about the suspension bridge getting into a freak accident that damages most of the bridge and for the limo her mentors were inside of, concern and fear washes over her like it isn't the first time she felt it. Concern, because if no one takes action, the people that welcomed her to the academy will die. Fear, almost for the same reason, and if they die, she wouldn't know what to do with herself.

"What do we do?" Logan asks her, after watching the breaking news story. "They're in danger."

"I know we can't do this on our own," Taylor reasons. She couldn't go out there either. What use is of her if she couldn't see? Even if people took pity of her and she hated it, she couldn't go out there and cause another freak accident due to her blindness. "I have to call Leo."

Without another interruption, she allows Logan to dial her friend's number, and then moves out of the way. "Taylor?" The familiar voice makes Taylor almost forget about everything. She feels several fluttering feelings in her stomach. "It's so good to see you! How are you dealing?"

"This isn't about me." She pushes her other feeling aside and tells him of the issue happening at the bridge. It convinces also to pick up his mission suit again and rebrand the team. Also, he convinces Taylor to come to the mission.

She feels determination, and a bit of bravery in her part. She also still feels scared that something may happen to compromise the mission. Confidence almost blinds her as soon as the students aboard the hydro loop.

/

"Someone is rejoining the academy."

Taylor feels her second round of happiness in her heart when she hears the footsteps. Everyone claps and wolf whistles around her. Of course, she knows who it is. She doesn't have to see it to believe it. What makes it even more cherishing is that her friend is now a mentor, and that makes her heart swell even more. It is not a foreign feeling - she is sure she felt that ever since they started picking names - but she cannot put her finger on what it is.

"Congratulations mister mentor," she announces, as soon as she senses Leo's presence in front of her. "And thank you."

"For what?"

"If it wasn't for you, I wouldn't have participated in another mission again," she explains. The only reason why she was able to save lives was all because of a person who never stopped believing in her from the moment they reached a compromise after their rocky start.

She feels a surge of happiness once again as she opens her arms and hugs her new mentor closely. She also feels the familiar fluttering in her stomach, accompanied with other weird sensations like her face heating up and her chest constricting. It dissolves once she hears Logan squeak out, "I love you guys!" and hugs them by behind. Her smile falls, and she's trying hard not to snarl at the young boy being intrusive during her moment.

It is later in the day when Taylor has another chance to talk to him. It's almost midnight, and she sneaks out of bed to get away from her dorm. However, she gets the opportunity to talk to her friend in the flesh, when they're sitting on the railing, outside of their dorms. "So, you haven't told me that thing."

"What thing?"

"That feeling you have when you wanna punch someone in the face," she explains, from the last time they talked about human emotion. She knows what it is, but she wants to hear it from someone else.

Leo doesn't stare at her quizzically. Instead, he decides to humor her. "Rage."

Taylor frowns, and doesn't even miss a beat when she punches Leo on the arm. He hisses in pain, while she smirks in triumph. "That is _not_ rage."

"Ok, it isn't," Leo relents. He stares at her for a second, and doesn't stop himself from asking his next question. "What do you feel now?"

"I'm not telling you that," she quickly shuts it down, and stops herself from blushing. "However, I do feel like punching you again."

Leo scowls, "What is up with you and punching? Is that what you feel all the time, because I have news for you."

"I'm not a sociopath, Leo," she frowns again.

"I beg to differ," Leo raises an eyebrow.

Taylor lets out an annoyed sigh. "For the weeks you weren't here, I started to understand emotion a little bit more. However, since you were the only person that understood that I have a clean slate, and that emotion is completely fucking weird, I felt alone. If you ever decide to quit the team again, at least...at least make me understand how to control my emotions."

"I can't help you control them," he says honestly. Taylor turns her head in his direction, and even Leo understands that she is glaring at him. "You have to control them yourself. If you feel happy, you feel happy. If you feel sad, then you feel sad. Emotion is complex. No one truly understands why they feel the way they feel sometimes. But, we know that they are there, and they make us feel human." He puts a hand on her shoulder. "And if I ever pull a move like that, I assure you I won't leave without letting you fully understand the concept of human emotion."

"Ok, one more question." She hears only silence, so it must mean to continue. "When Logan said that he loved us, what did that mean?"

"It means that we're his only friends and that he cares for us deeply," Leo answers, feeling like he answered it wrong. "It has different meanings. For example, he loves us from a friendly, or rather a platonic standpoint. There's also familial love, which is me telling my stepfather and my siblings that I love them...and then there's romantic love, which is the worst. Don't ever fall In that ninth circle of hell."

Taylor laughs immediately at the comment. "You saying that makes me think that you fell in the 'ninth circle of hell' at least once in your life."

"Twice, actually," he says, and fidgets a little. "I never told anyone of the first time, because people wouldn't really expect it. The second time is with my ex-girlfriend. We broke up during the two weeks I wasn't here."

"What happened? She wasn't digging the so-called Leo charm?" Taylor asks jokingly, despite wanting to find the girl and choke the ever loving stuff out of her.

"Something like that," Leo replies, still feeling affected by a breakup he couldn't control.

Taylor doesn't ponder on it further. It seems like a sensitive topic. "What about the first time?" After she asks, a very tensioned silence surrounds the both of them. Taylor shakes her head and raises an eyebrow. "Come on, Leo. If you haven't noticed, you and Logan are the only close friends I have. I'm not gonna tell anyone, and I certainly won't hate you for it."

Leo sighs. This is the first time he's ever mentioned anything about that, and as much he wants to trust her and say something, he just can't bring himself to say it. "I know that, but sometimes I still haven't come to terms with it, plus the person is dead."

"Ok, you don't have to tell me anymore," she says, already feeling bad for prying. She suspects that even if the person is dead, the person still mattered to him in some way. "Just...how do you know when you feel that romantic love?"

"That...you will definitely know when you feel it. I don't really have to explain it. It isn't always the worst, though. I haven't had the best luck with it, but all of my romantic interests were special to me, and I always felt happy when I was around them." After that, Leo casts his head down and fidgets with his fingers.

Taylor tilts her head to the side. "I...I think I get it."

He stops fidgeting, and glances at Taylor. "Huh?"

Taylor doesn't even think anymore. She reaches over and grabs her mentor by the shirt, and kisses Leo on the lips. Leo is surprised by this action, but after a few seconds, he closes his eyes and kisses back, but keeping his hands to his sides. A lot of things are running through his mind, but the one thing that stands out is that he knew that something was there. Of course, he ignored it hoping that he wouldn't have his heart broken for the third time, but that wouldn't change anything.

Of course they liked each other.

Taylor instantly pulls away, and immediately wished she wasn't blinded by the stupid EMP ability to look at Leo's face, whether it was shocked, angered, or some other emotion she wasn't sure of. "Well...shit. If you're mad, I'm really sorry."

"I'm not mad," he replies. "Just...surprised, is all."

"As long as you're not mad." She relaxes, and faces away from Leo. "I just...I don't know how I feel. My stomach is fluttering, my heart rate is crazy, and...I thought I pissed you off."

"It means you have a crush," Leo says matter of factly. He couldn't stop blushing either.

"Is that bad?" She questions.

Leo chuckles. "No, definitely not. In fact...I have a crush on you too, so the feeling's mutual."

"Oh," Taylor shrugs. "And here, I thought that…" She stops herself, preventing herself from saying something else. She doesn't want to make it more awkward than it already is. "You know what, whatever."

Leo ignores that last part. He just grabs Taylor's face and kisses her again


End file.
